A Real Ada…
My darling big cousin set the standard for what every “real Ada” (1st born daughter) should be like.
She’d often say to me “Ada, we have to remember the family we’re from, we don’t just do things anyhow.” She oozed elegance, grace and style with intentionality and unwavering confidence. The kind that comes from knowing who you are and whose you are.
I remember visiting her in Atlanta for the first time in decades, she made sure she made time to spend quality time with me, of course she wanted to, but she also knew it was her duty, and she did not take the duty of mentoring her little cousin lightly. She took me shopping at David Yurman and for lunch at the Cheesecake Factory. She took the opportunity to teach me things that I didn’t even know I needed to know about jewelry and family and relationships.
I also remember her visit to Nigeria a short time after that, when she kindly spent a few days with me despite her very busy schedule. Again, filling me with advice and stories and lessons that I took for granted, because I thought I would always have her words at my disposal. Silly me. Most recently, I will forever cherish the times we spent together in Houston both for sad and happy occasions… if only I knew that last time would indeed be the last time. I can’t quite believe that the next time I’m in Atlanta you won’t be there. That feels unthinkable, I really can’t wrap my head around that fact.
You and Uncle Chuka’s marriage was so inspiring. Forever besties, forever gisting partners, truly like one whole person. Your regal, queen like presence will be sorely missed at every family event from now on. That composed and polished senior “Ada” standing in the corner silently reminding us all, of the minimum “standard”. Because… “things must be done well”
What a loss.
What a shock.
And what gratitude I feel for the laughter, the love and the memories.
Sleep well, my darling big cousin, this does not feel good. But God knows best.
Lots of Love, Adaobi Iwugo ❤